


An Abandoned Arithmancy Classroom

by postjentacular



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Crack, Drabbles, F/F, M/M, Not even a little bit canon-compliant, Unless you count bi!Harry as canon (which it is)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-19
Updated: 2017-02-19
Packaged: 2018-09-25 14:05:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 400
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9823832
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/postjentacular/pseuds/postjentacular
Summary: One abandoned Arithmancy classroom, four connected drabbles.





	

Pansy Parkinson would like you to know that she really rather likes her girlfriend. She would like you to know, but she certainly wouldn't be the one to tell you. Pansy Parkinson, the most eligible, elegant débutante of the Sacred Twenty-Eight, could not tell you that the girl moaning and gasping as she rode her fingers in a dusty, abandoned Hogwarts’ Arithmancy classroom was the love of her life. She couldn't tell you, not because that girl was a bushy-haired, bossy muggleborn; it was far worse than that. That girl was a _Gryffindor_. Parkinsons, after all, create scenes not scandals.

Hermione Granger knew she had a middle name but she certainly couldn't remember it; it’d been fucked right out of her brain along with the spell for locking doors and if the milk went in before or after the teabag. She knew she shouldn’t be here but when your girlfriend has Slytherin cunning in spades and a monopoly on the market for salacious gossip, you can afford to take the risk. When said girlfriend flicks and twists her deliciously dexterous fingers just right and the rush kills off another brain cell then Hermione Granger closes her eyes and forgets everything.

Draco Malfoy knew what he stood for – family, honour, and an overwhelming need to make it through a whole day without being hexed – his traitorous cock, however, stood for messy hair with a penchant for saving people. He did not, as a rule, make mistakes; his cock, however, had its own agenda which frequently overruled his brain without hesitation. His cock – and the aforementioned messy hair – was the reason he was in this unfortunate predicament; of the things Draco Malfoy needed right now, seeing that particular coupling was at the very bottom of his list. Fucking a _Gryffindor_ , how déclassé.

Harry Potter was confused and horny, neither of which were – to be honest – unusual feelings for him. One minute there'd been hands heading south into boxers, tongues everywhere and the next they’d tumbled through a door and there was shouting about corrupting Gryffindor’s Royalty, hypocrisy and ‘it’s never _just_ fucking’. He didn’t know where to look: the argument made him uncomfortable; his scantily clad, post-orgasmic best friend made him _Uncomfortable_. Harry Potter stared at the floor and wondered how difficult it would be for it to open up and swallow him whole. This would never have happened with a Hufflepuff.

**Author's Note:**

>  **Standard fanfic disclaimer:** If you recognise it, it belongs to J.K. Rowling; this is just fanfic for nothing other than entertainment purposes


End file.
